I am writing this in a somewhat delirious haze. A certain tiny lady woke at 1am and then did not sleep again until about 4am. Needless to say I am shattered, wrecked, knackered, tired beyond words. Not only was she awake at 1am but she was wide awake as in standing at the end of her cot, talking at the top of her voice awake. This is not like her. She hasn’t woken at night since those early, sleep-deprived newborn days and I have always been thankful for it. If she does wake she is generally still very sleepy and easy enough to lure back to sleep.
Not so last night. Or should I say this morning. I went in and picked her up. She was thrilled. She was also burning up. The thermometer read 35.4 degrees but I know a sick toddler when I see one. She was behaving very much like I do when I have a fever – very chatty, very hot and very hyper. She actually asked me for calpol! I agreed it seemed like a good idea. Calpol was duly administered. I climbed into the spare bed with her and was just drifting off to sleep when the chatting began again. Great. Here comes the calpol high. She was telling me all sorts of stories – half of them so garbled I couldn’t even make out what she was saying…and I was so tired I didn’t care to be quite honest. Then she started to shout for water. The neighbours must love us – a loud toddler screaming for water and a mother on the verge of shouting back. I gave her water, I settled her back down….and then she started to bounce on the bed. Bouncing on the bed at 3am! What fresh hell is this! I was very close to tears and very close to losing the rag…but you can’t very well get cross with a sick child can you?! Can you??
Obviously the easiest solution would have been to call my husband. He even offered to take over. But no. Thank you maternal instinct because as much as I was hating the lack of sleep I knew I couldn’t leave her either. I would only end up lying in my own bed listening out for her and wanting to be near her again.
There were some compensations. She isn’t the most cuddly of creatures but she was extremely cuddly last night. She rolled herself into me but then kept jumping awake causing me to wake from various nonsensical dream scenarios with a start. She also woke at one point asking for Bing’s house. I can only guess she was visiting Bing in her dreams! Finally, finally after seconds that felt like hours and minutes that felt like days she fell properly asleep. It was an unsettled sleep with lots of snuffles and murmurs but it was sleep.
Husband took over at nine am but like Lady MacBeth sleep was lost to me now. Husband, noting the bags under my eyes, begged me to nap when she does. She is napping now and here I am writing so you can imagine how I took that advice! Now off I go to get more coffee and carbs and cheese – these will surely keep me going!*
*Apologies if this blog lacks sense and any kind of meaning!